On the road that runs from hating an individual to loving that individual, is a stopping point that tempts many of us. Once we learn that we can "attract more bees with honey than vinegar" we find a practical reason not to express our hatred. So we hide it. We learn to cover it with kindness, respect, or love of a superficial sort. We get what we want out of people by being toward them what we see they want.
But that is only a stopping point on the way to love. While it's a good thing to stop doing hateful things, and it's a good thing to start doing loving things, they are not love if they are not motivated by something greater than "I can get from them easier if I give them what they want. That's giving to get, which seems more manipulative than loving. Loving someone, sincerely, means so much more.
1 Pet 1:22 Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for your brothers, love one another deeply, from the heart.
Rom 12:9 Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.
2 Cor 6:4-6 Rather, as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: in great endurance; in troubles, hardships and distresses; 5 in beatings, imprisonments and riots; in hard work, sleepless nights and hunger; 6 in purity, understanding, patience and kindness; in the Holy Spirit and in sincere love;
The greek word, translated "sincere/ly" is "an-hupokritos" -- without hypocrisy.
It means seeing them the way God sees them, caring for them the way God cares for them, and delivering to them what God wants delivered to them, regardless of the results you may or may not get. We're not given the option of smiling at one another, then stabbing, undermining, grumbling, plotting, etc. behind another's back, even if that grumbly, stabby, plotty stuff resides only in our heart and never comes out to play.
Thus Jesus loved the disciples who would fail, the crowds who would use selfishly then abandon, and the pharisees who would kill. He really loved. Oh that I could love the way He loves.
